Hi Dad

This time two years ago my father died from a long painful fight with colon cancer. I just wanted to write a quick note letting him know that I love and miss him greatly. I know he will get this message because he reads my blog in the computer department in Heaven. Yes, they have the internet there. What??...you didn't know that?

Cousin Jude Passes On

I just received a phone call from my Aunt (Janet) who gave me some bad news. She informed me that Cousin Jude died last night at 8:00pm in Doctor's Hospital. He had been in ICU for three weeks now and the whole time he was in a coma.

This is how the events led to this...

Jude Kemp was working out in his yard with a gardener and they were lifting heavy things. Jude had to go to the bathroom and he filled the toilet with blood. He thought that he had an infection and that he had strained himself and pulled something inside of him. He had to go to the bathroom a few more times that day as well with the same results.

Once hearing about this his daughter Beth told him that he had to "go to the hospital." He didn't want to go; he had to be pushed.

When he was in the hospital he underwent a colonoscopy which reveled that his small intestine was filled with blood. They sent him to the Operating Room where they removed four feet from his small intestine.

He was admitted to the Intensive Care Unit after the operation so they could monitor him better. He passed more blood later and had to have another operation because they found more blood clots in his intestines.

Jude did not wake up after the second operation; he was in a coma. I visited him in ICU and did not recognize who he was because his face was so swollen from all the drugs. If it were not for Beth standing at his bedside holding his hand I would have walked by not knowing.

He had a bunch of tubes going in and out of him and had a cold blanket over his legs and stomach which was used to keep his fevers at bay. Beth said to me "Daddy doesn't like the cold." I replied jokingly that she had " better get a hot water bottle and put that on top of the blanket then." We laughed and made a few giggles at other things too. Laughter is my medicine; it helps to get by the rough patches in life.

A week and a few days later I heard from my Uncle (Godfrey) that Jude's kidneys were not working properly and that Jude had to get hooked up to a dialysis machine. His kidneys were failing him; his body was shutting down.

Two nights ago the doctor overseeing Cousin Jude called the immediate family in and asked them what they wanted to do because Jude had been on life support for a long time. The doctor asked them if they wanted to take Jude off life support and see what his body does or leave him on. They decided to leave him on. I guess God had to make this decision for them because the next night he died.

More Bad News - Will this ever stop?

Yesterday I found out that my Grandmother was taken to the hospital in the morning due to the fact that the day nurse taking care of her at home said that her pulse was "deadly low" and that she "needed to go to the hospital".

I did not visit her yesterday but made it there today, but just not as early as I would have liked it. I left the office at around six o'clock and went to Doctor's Hospital where my Grandmother was in ICU.

Upon exiting the elevator on the third floor I spoke to one of the nurses at the nurse station and she informed me that a lot of my family were "going in room 307" and that my "grandmother can only have two people at a time" by her bedside. I saw room 307 to my right and walked towards it not knowing what to expect. I peered into the room and saw a relative of mine which I have not seen in a while. His name is Jude and he is my cousins 74 year old grandfather.

He is not doing so well. He his having a a colonoscopy tomorrow morning. Apparently has has lost a lot of blood and the nurses there were giving him more at one point. He was busy drinking tea and drinking broth too.

I went and saw my grandmother who was totally out of it sleeping. She looks so frail now...well she's been looking this way for a few months now...slowing loosing weight. This is the last of my grands; the rest have already left this world. She is really special to me. I remember back in the day when I was a little boy she would call me 'Bong-see'. It's obviously not a real word, just my nick name she gave me with love.

Later in the waiting room I got the ok from one of the nurses that it was alright to see granny. She was awake now and I was able to talk with her. I stroked her hair and kissed her forehead as I told her "I love Granny." I said to her that she needed her sleep and to have a good night and that I would see her in tomorrow.

After arriving home from 2 plus hours in the hospital I got some more shitty news. I found out that Joe has been given 6 months to live. My eyes welted up with the emotion that filled my heart. "This sucks!!" I can't believe this!

This has indeed been a "Terrible Tuesday", just as my gmail custom message was set to today. I'm so tired of death...but it's one of those shitty harsh realities we all have to deal with. All you can do is live each day like it's your last.